Lizzie Saltz just wanted to find her snack bag. Instead, she stumbled into a midnight ritual full of ominous chanting, black-robed figures, and what definitely looked like a murder cult. Naturally, she did what any sane person would do-crashed the ritual and handed out glow sticks.

Turns out, they're not a cult. They're just a supernatural crime family with questionable morals and an alarming number of weapons. Instead of sacrificing her (or, you know, letting her leave), they adopt her. Aggressively.

Now, Lizzie's got a lot of problems:

• Darius, the broody vampire crime lord, keeps trying to intimidate her (it's not working).
• Lucien, the knife-happy werewolf, snarls at her constantly but melts when she boops his nose.
• Azrael, the dangerously seductive demon, attempted to corrupt her soul but ended up getting emotionally compromised instead.
• Selene, the flirty, chaotic witch, is way too amused by all of this and might be planning to keep Lizzie as her personal plaything.

Between near-death experiences, an entire warehouse getting torched in her honor, and a jealousy-fueled bar brawl that almost started a supernatural war, Lizzie has one realization: she's completely in love with all of them.

Now, she's officially part of the supernatural mafia empire, laundering their dirty money through an Etsy store (because why not), dodging rival syndicates, and navigating a very complicated five-way relationship.

One thing's for sure:
This is not the life she planned... but it might just be the one she was born for.