To some, Samuel Vaden is a real estate professional in Florida and California. To others, he is a music entertainment and tech entrepreneur. Unbeknownst to all, he had been living with a secret for 13 years, a secret that almost killed him. For the first time in 13 years, Samuel opens up about his battle with Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) and Anorexia Nervosa. He unveils his struggle through an emotional introductory story and a series of vulnerable poems. Vaden starts his book with a deeply personal account of his experience at West Point - which triggered his 13-year struggle with the psychological, and consequently, physical disorders. His collection of poetry conveys the wide-ranging set of emotions endured over the course of 13 years - from the day he became obsessed with his body image, the day he was discharged from the military, the period of love found and love lost, the period of internalizing shame and anxiety, culminating in the journey to California in 2013 where recovery and realization occurred. Samuel's book is a message of pain, suffering, angst, shame, recovery, growth and healing. Poetry and writing was Samuel's therapy during his darkest days. It is now his guiding light to help others realize their self-worth, to confront harmful, gender-based eating disorder/body disorder stereotypes (in both civilian and military settings) and to raise awareness for the most vulnerable in our society.