You've probably heard about those guys with prestigious careers, expensive homes, beautiful wives and loving families, who coast along effortlessly thinking everything is fine, until one day they wake up and realize that they've wasted their lives chasing dreams that weren't theirs and pursuing goals that didn't make them happy. Well, except for the high-paying job, the beautiful woman, the kids and the nice house, that's pretty much my story. This is how the narrator and protagonist of The Useless Detective introduces himself. He's arguably smarter than most people, but he has no ambition or work ethic, so aside from being a mediocre detective, he's also lazy, cynical, and usually drunk. Middle-aged and weary of life, he resents the fact that he never amounted to much. He doesn't particularly enjoy his work, but when he reluctantly attends a college reunion party, he finds himself thrust into a situation where the keen instincts of a private investigator are needed. His college friends have always looked down on him for not living up to his potential, and now-after twenty years-he finally has the opportunity to redeem himself in front of them.